How I'm Dealing with COVID-19
These little boogers keeping everything reaaaaaal normal around here.
WHAT. A. MONTH. I’m going to be very transparent. I’ve struggled. I retreated. The first 2 weeks in particular were a rollercoaster of emotions, moods and thoughts. One day feeling level 100 anxiety and the next a knowing sense of calm that everything will be ok.
I finally realized at about the 2.5 week mark that I was going through the stages of grief. I’m currently at stage 5, acceptance so that’s good. Lol. My kids have honestly been my saving grace because for them it’s business as usual.
The hardest thing for me and my type A personality has been the uncertainty. Nothing in life is certain sure, but the daily certainties have been ripped out from underneath us overnight. I’m a planner and all I can do right now is plan our meals. The universe has presented me with a huge challenge.
I’ve seen a lot of memes and such on the inter webs about how we should or shouldn’t be acting during this time. These are unprecedented times and we all have to find our own way. Now that I’m out of the trenches I want to share what has helped me shift my perspective in hopes that if you need it, they may help you too.
We Start the Day as Usual
The first week, unless it was a day I was working with clients, I stayed in my pajamas and didn't make the bed, which is something I usually do every day. I knew that was contributing to my feelings of a loss of control, so now, everyone gets dressed after breakfast, the beds get made and it’s made a big difference.
I Practice Gratitude
Almost every day I commit to a gratitude practice. I’ve done this sporadically in the past but began a daily practice earlier this year with Rachel Hollis’ Start Today Journal. I write down at least 5 things I am grateful for. This was VERY hard in the beginning of COVID-19, but now the gratitude flows right onto the page. Look for the good and you will find more good.
I Speak Affirmations
Along with the gratitude, I write down affirmations. These are more or less statements of how I want to act, believe, or look at things. Here are a few that have helped me:
I release control of this situation.
I am safe. I choose calm over panic.
Smart people are coming up with solutions. I trust in their ability to help.
I move everyday to strengthen my body and mind.
There is joy in this situation.
I’ve Committed to a Yoga Practice
I’ve done yoga on and off and always liked it, but committing to a daily practice has been a game changer for me. Truthfully, after the first 5 days in a row, I didn’t even have to commit, because I genuinely look forward to my time on the mat to strengthen my body and BREATHE. Breathe out all the negativity and stress. Breathe in calm.
I’ve done Alo Moves classes on their YouTube channel, but decided to try their 14-day free trial on their platform and I am hooked. The classes, variety, teachers, all of it- so good.
I Stepped Back From Social Media & News
During the first 1.5-2 weeks, I felt like this was all I did. Check Instagram. Check News app. Check Facebook. Check News on TV. I was addicted to the information and to the panic. I was scared and wanted to digest as much information as possible to assess the situation, to somehow stay in control.
The obsessive nature of consulting these platforms all day was ruining my mental health. Now, I stay informed, but my time spent here is very limited.
I Gave Myself a Break
Having a 2 and 4 year old, still trying to run a small business and a household is NOT easy. There’s a reason why childcare exists. This expectation that we are going to do it all is insane and unfair.
Some days I feel like supermom. We watch no TV and I stimulate my kids all day and I have the hutzpah to reorganize the junk drawer and other days, we watch 3 movies and eat and that’s enough.
There’s no right way to act. Do what you can, when you can. Don’t compare yourself to others and their journey. Trust me, everyone in struggling in their own way.
I Changed My Mindset
One of the things that has brought me down the most is knowing how patients and medical staff are suffering, and what I am about to say DOES NOT lessen that, but I have started to view this time as a gift. The time that we have as a family right now is precious.
At Target, I saw the board game shelves almost empty. This warmed my heart, because that means families are being forced to slow down and reconnect.
We as a society are over scheduled and overcommitted and this contributes largely to our disease burden. We have been forced to slow down, enjoy and take care of each other and do not HAVE to do anything other than exist. WHAT A GIFT.
If you want to learn Mandarin Chinese, good for you. If you want to rewatch Game of Thrones, excellent. If you want to color coordinate your closet, great! My hope is that if and when you do get to the point where you view this time as a gift, you will do something meaningful with it, whatever that means to you.
The bottom line here is there is no correct way to behave here. If you’re like me, you’ll need to take time to process what is happening, to mourn the loss of the life you knew. When I started to realize that our lives may never go back to being “normal'“ I felt sad and scared. Now I am trying to embrace that maybe things needed to change. This tragic, awful situation may be the birth of some beautiful things.
I know I’ll still feel scary, anxious feelings and some days will be harder than others, but I’m using this toolkit to help me cope and continue to look for the light no matter what lies ahead, for better or worse.
I’d love to know what’s helped you cope too.
In health,
Tara